Double feature

I've been away for a while so you get twice the content for this post. I got a great stoner story, plus a pretty wacked out video.

It was late, I ordered a pizza, and I was very stoned. I ran down and I saw a guy, standing there, with a big bag and at this point, I was like a bull seeing red, I knew my pizza was in that bag. I go to hand you 20$ and you stand there, I think you tell me, its 16$, so I try to hand you 20$. You wont take it, your hands are up, your saying something, so I try to give you 25$ but you keep saying something and walk away. You walked away with my pizza while my thirst was so strong, my hunger so epic that I knew there was going to be Greek poem that rivals the Odyssey written about it, but you walked away with everything I ever wanted. At this point, while staring at you, my blood shot eyes started to roam your attire, I realized you were just a jogger who got done grocery shopping and were trying to get into the apartment complex. This whole time you were shouting, “I'M NOT THE PIZZA GUY, HE IS!”. I now realized that the red uniform the pizza man was wearing acted like camouflage against the red brick walls, he was like the predator emerging from the jungle, very tricky pizza man.